Here's a controversial take: discipline is overrated. It's what people lean on when they don't understand the game they're playing.
Everyone talks about discipline like it's the answer. "Just be disciplined. Just force yourself. Just push through."
But you have the whole thing wrong.
Discipline is doing things when you don't want to. But why wouldn't you want to? When it makes sense?
And if it makes sense but you don't want to, that means you don't understand.
There are three states:
Identifying desire - Why are you doing what you're doing at an innate level? Why do you want that in the first place? This is tied to your ego and belief system. What is it that you actually want?
Identifying homework - Understanding the game. What is required? If you don't know the homework, you practice until you know the homework. That's the feedback loop.
Practicing - If you know the homework, you practice. You do the work. You're playing in the arena.
These three states move you forward. When you're not in any of these states, you're stuck.
So it just makes sense to go out there and do shit. Work. Be playing in the arena.
It ain't discipline. It's just what you gotta do.
Understand the game first.
People want to "get good at tennis." So they fixate on certain spikes or skill moves. They focus on how they hit the ball.
But tennis isn't about how you hit the ball.
Tennis is a 1v1 competition. You earn a point when the other person fails to hit the ball back. That's how you win. Not based on how good you hit the ball.
When you understand that, your focus shifts. You watch the opposing player. Their position. You capitalize on where they are. More importantly, where they aren't.
Then when you notice you can't direct the ball to the spots you intend, you practice how you hit.
The sequence matters.
1. Understand the game
2. Understand what that game requires (the homework)
3. Observe what's happening
4. Note where you're coming short
5. Address the limitations
You're not "disciplining yourself to practice your serve." You're observing that you can't place the ball where you need it to go, so you work on that. It's logical. It makes sense.
The same applies to running.
People say "I want to run a marathon." Okay, what does that actually mean?
It's not about completing 26 miles. It's not like nothing happens until you cross that line.
You're essentially demanding agency from "god." Please give me the freedom to run 26 miles and be normal and sane.
That's what you're asking for. You're demanding physical agency.
Okay, then that means you need a body that functions mile to mile. So you naturally pay attention to your body. You don't yell at yourself "I'm gonna do 10km, 15km, 20km!" No.
You try. You listen. You note. You study what's wrong. You improvise form. You add warm-ups. You listen to your body.
Sometimes my mind gets bored during a run. No new body symptoms yet, but my mind goes "uhh" because I've never done this distance before. Then I think: but I haven't had any new physical symptom yet. I didn't learn anything from this run about my body.
And that's the whole point of running.
So I say okay, let's keep running till I feel a new symptom. A new slight pressure. A new milestone.
This is why you should be meticulous and detail-oriented. Not because you "have to." Because it makes sense.
When you're used to it, you have a new lens for seeing things. What once was a bug getting in the way of your goal of 26 miles is now a feature. Each body ache tells you about your body. How you should train. Where you should reinforce.
That's the way you need to go about it.
This applies everywhere.
Interviewing. The game: power imbalance. This is not level communication. If it's a technical interview, they have the answer for the problem they're asking you. They know the solution.
So the natural thing you should do to increase the chance of getting help is talk your steps out. Not because you need to prove yourself. Because the point is to solve the problem, and they have the answer, and when you walk through your thoughts there's an increased chance of being assisted.
It's the game.
The framework:
1. What game are you playing? Not what you think you're playing. What's actually happening. What determines success.
2. What does that game require? What's the homework? What agencies do you need?
3. Observe with your eyes. Listen with your ears. Not with your thoughts. Not with your plans. What's actually happening?
4. Note where you're coming short. Write it down. Track it. If something doesn't make sense, keep doing it and see the pattern.
5. Address the limitation. Not through discipline. Through understanding what's required and doing that.
Stop trying to force yourself. Start understanding what you're actually trying to do.
Everything should make sense. If you understand the game, the work makes sense. If the work doesn't make sense, you don't understand the game yet.
That's not a discipline problem. That's an understanding problem.
When you're in one of the three states - identifying desire, identifying homework, or practicing - you're moving. When you're not in any of these states, you're stuck.
When Life Throws You Off
Sometimes you wake up and don't know what's wrong. Something bothers you. You feel off.
And sometimes you don't even know what's bothering you. It's not a clear trigger. It's just this feeling. Unease. Restlessness. Like something's wrong but you can't name it.
The natural response: reach for comfort. Distraction. Validation. Anything that gives you immense dopamine. Anything to make the feeling go away.
This is seeking perfection in disguise.
Your mind gets attached to finding the perfect answer. The perfect action that will fix everything. The perfect insight that will make it all make sense.
But that's not how it works. That's not one of the three states. That's being stuck.
You don't need perfection. You need feedback.
Understanding what's actually happening: Life is boolean.
All of life comes down to two states. You either feel agency or you don't. That's it. That's all there is.
You're either a sharp knife ready to conquer, ready to mark your territory like Alexander the Great. Or you're not.
When you don't feel agency, it feels like a massive uphill battle to get it back. To try to believe when you don't. To force yourself when everything feels heavy. The gap between where you are and where you need to be feels insurmountable.
The actual move: Pull the "other side" down.
Instead of trying to lift yourself up when you're down, pull the other side down. Ask yourself: Why don't I feel agency right now? And when did I feel agency? What was different?
Here's what you'll realize: Life is hard no matter what. The challenge is always there. Things are always biased against you. Things are always out of your control. That doesn't change.
When you felt agency, it's probably because you lacked awareness of what the blockade actually was. You just didn't see the blockade as clearly. You were operating with incomplete information about how hard it actually was.
When you don't feel agency, you see the blockade more clearly. You understand all the ways it could fail. All the requirements. All the obstacles. That's the difference.
This recognition makes the worse not feel that worse. The "good times" when you felt agency? They weren't actually easier. You just didn't see it as clearly. So right now, when you feel stuck, you're not actually in a worse position. You're just more aware.
Recognize what this feeling actually is: You're overwhelmed.
That's all it is. You're overwhelmed.
Either you feel really small compared to what's required. Or the problem feels really big compared to what you can handle.
Both create the same feeling: paralysis. The weight of taking a chance feels so heavy. The idea of trying becomes daunting.
Now you need to tackle that. And there are many different ways to approach it. Different methods work for different people, and even for the same person in different states.
Method 1: Deglorify the outcome
Make the problem feel smaller by recognizing you're glorifying it.
You notice yourself glorifying things when you think the outcome is the only option. When you think if you don't get this, you're fucked. Life becomes binary in your head. Pass or fail. Get this or lose everything.
But most often, life is NOT boolean. There are alternative options. Life has a lot of options, man.
And I'm not even talking about second-tier options. There are comparable first-tier options that you have to find. Options that would satisfy the same underlying desire. Options that would get you to the same place, just through a different path.
But when you don't recognize that - when you tunnel vision on this one specific outcome - you start glorifying that option. The problem becomes so much bigger in your head than it actually is. That stops you from being able to think properly. It quite literally strips the agency from you.
You have no agency because now you have no choice. It's this or nothing. That's the trap.
When you deglorify, you recognize: there are other paths. This isn't the only way. If this doesn't work, there are alternatives that are just as good. That recognition alone makes the problem smaller. The stakes aren't as high as you thought. You can take the shot because missing isn't the end.
Method 2: Create feedback loops (Make the problem literally smaller)
This is the feedback method. But it's also quite literally the "make the problem smaller" method.
Instead of deglorifying to change your perception, you actually break the problem down into pieces that ARE smaller. You create visibility on progress.
Breaking down problems is just creating feedback loops. There's no other way to really break down a problem than creating feedback loops that show you're moving forward.
You need a feedback loop that is visible. Be obsessed with feedback loops. Set a proper forcing function - something that tells you if you're on track or not.
And the forcing function should always change because at some point your current forcing function shows diminishing returns. It stops being useful feedback. You need to evolve it as you progress.
When you have a visible feedback loop, you're not carrying the full weight of the problem. You're just carrying today's piece. Did I move forward today? Yes or no. That's manageable.
The marathon example: You're not carrying "can I run 26 miles?" every day. You're carrying "did my body give me new feedback today?" That's a smaller problem. That's something you can tackle.
Method 3: Strip expectations (Trust the process)
Make yourself dull. Remove the burden from yourself.
You see this often in people who aren't religious before, going religious after they go through a rough patch. They basically say: "Okay, I tried my best and I didn't make it. I will shift my faith to you, my Lord, and see what happens."
This is you telling yourself: I'm going to find a way to do what I'm supposed to do, but I'm stripping away the expectations from the outcome.
It's interesting. This is the "trust the process" method. Religious or not. People say that often. "Just trust the process. I'm sure it'll work out."
You're neither making yourself bigger nor making the problem smaller. You're just removing the weight of needing it to work out a specific way.
You still do the work. You still show up. But you're not carrying the outcome. You're trusting that if you do the right things, something will work out. Maybe not exactly as planned, but something.
This isn't my primary method, but it is a method. For some people, for some situations, this is what gets them unstuck.
Method 4: Magnitude shrinking
Make both you AND the problem small simultaneously.
This is achieved by being exposed to people of far greater caliber - people who are like 5 tiers above you in whatever domain you're struggling with.
You can do this by listening to podcasts, watching long-form interviews, reading about people operating at levels you can barely comprehend.
When you immerse yourself in their world, two things happen:
First, whatever you're putting on a pedestal - the problem that feels so massive - you realize isn't that deep. It's nowhere near a big enough task compared to what these people are tackling. The problems they solve in a day are bigger than your entire stuck point.
Second, you make yourself very small in comparison. You're not the protagonist in a grand drama. You're just someone trying to figure something out. The weight of being "special" or "the chosen one" falls away. You're just working.
This works really well for me personally. It gives me immense grounding. It strips away the drama I create around my own situation.
But it's hard to sustain because those people aren't around me in daily life. Sometimes I get podcast fatigue. But when I need it, it's super effective.
Method 5: Extreme pessimism (Goggins/Tate method)
Take away expectations through black-and-white pessimism.
David Goggins says stuff like "when was man ever happy?" Andrew Tate says "just shut up and do it." This method is telling you: stop negotiating with yourself. Stop asking if you feel like it. Just execute.
This is kind of like the trust-the-process method but different enough to be its own category. You're taking away expectations from your process, but it's very black and white. Very forcing. Very "there is no option."
Not the biggest fan for me personally because it feels very forcing. Doesn't feel sustainable long-term. But it is a method. And for some people, in some moments, this is what breaks them out of paralysis.
The underlying framework:
Everything comes down to life being boolean. You either have agency or you feel like you don't.
And the way you navigate between those two states comes down to these categories:
→ Deglorify the outcome - recognize there are alternatives
→ Create feedback loops - make the problem literally smaller through visibility
→ Strip expectations - trust the process, remove outcome attachment
→ Magnitude shrinking - expose yourself to greater scale, make everything smaller
→ Extreme pessimism - remove the question of whether you feel like it
These aren't mutually exclusive. Sometimes you use multiple. Sometimes one method works for a season, then stops working, and you need a different one.
The point is: when you're overwhelmed, you have options. You're not stuck with just "try harder" or "be more disciplined." You can strategically change how you're seeing the situation. That's agency.
The high agency move when you're thrown off:
1. Stop. Acknowledge you're thrown off.
Don't spiral. Don't reach for comfort. Don't try to think your way out of it immediately. Just acknowledge the state you're in: I'm thrown off. I don't feel agency right now.
2. Try to identify what's bothering you.
Sometimes you can identify it:
→ Someone has something you don't, and it's triggering comparison?
→ You failed at something and now you're questioning yourself?
→ You feel behind and time is running out?
→ You don't know what to do next and you're stuck in analysis?
If you can identify it, that's good. Now you know what you're dealing with.
But sometimes you can't. Sometimes you're just not thinking sane. Your mind is in a weird state and you can't even articulate what's wrong. That's okay too. That happens.
3. Pick a method and apply it.
Based on what you identified (or didn't identify), pick one of the methods:
Are you glorifying this one outcome? Deglorify. Recognize alternatives.
Is the problem too big and you need visibility? Create feedback loops. Break it down.
Are you carrying too much outcome weight? Strip expectations. Trust the process.
Are you too stuck in your own drama? Magnitude shrink. Listen to someone 5 tiers above.
Are you negotiating with yourself too much? Extreme pessimism. Remove the question.
Pick one. Execute it. Don't try to pick the perfect method. Just pick one that feels right and do it.
4. Fall back to mediocre.
When you can't even identify the problem clearly, when you're just in a weird state and nothing makes sense, fall back to abstract, vibe-based thinking.
Ask yourself:
→ What does Alex want in abstract? Not specifically. Just in vibes. What's the general direction?
→ What would mediocre Alex do right now?
Not perfect Alex. Not heroic Alex who solves everything. Not the version of yourself that would impress everyone.
Mediocre Alex.
What would any average person in your position do to not fall behind? What's the floor? What's the minimum that keeps you in the game?
→ If it's physical: Walk. Do one mile. Eat clean today. Just don't regress.
→ If it's capability: Code one problem. Read one chapter. Ship one small thing.
→ If it's social: Text one person. Show up to one thing. Just stay in the arena.
5. Do that.
Don't try to solve everything. Don't try to understand everything. Don't try to have the perfect insight that fixes your whole life.
Just do the mediocre homework.
That's it. That's the move.
You're back in one of the three states now. You're practicing. You're in the arena. You're getting feedback from reality instead of spiraling in your head.
The comfort will come from doing the thing, not from avoiding it.
Why this works:
When you're thrown off, you're not thinking clearly. You're in a weird mental state. Your compass is broken.
Trying to find the perfect answer from that state is like trying to navigate with a broken compass. You're just going to go in circles. You're going to spiral.
You need to reset first. Get back to baseline. Do something you know is right even when you can't think straight.
That's what mediocre is for. It's the floor. The thing you do even when everything else is unclear. When you don't know if you're going the right direction, when you don't know if this is the right path, when you can't see the full picture - you still know what mediocre looks like.
Doing mediocre gets you back in the arena. Back in reality. Back where you can observe what's actually happening, get real feedback, and adjust based on that feedback instead of your spiraling thoughts.
The clarity comes from doing, not from thinking.
When you're confused, don't do things radically away from what you know.
When you're in a weird state and you suddenly want to pivot everything, change everything, start completely new things - that's usually avoidance disguised as ambition.
Your brain is reaching for the perfect answer because it's uncomfortable with not knowing. It wants to escape the current discomfort by creating a new story, a new path, a new identity.
But you don't need the perfect answer. You don't need the radical pivot. You need to iterate for feedback.
Return to baseline. Do mediocre within the context you're already in. Build from there. Let the next step reveal itself through doing, not through desperate planning.
Sometimes you don't even know what's bothering you. That's fine. Do mediocre anyway. The answer reveals itself through doing, not through seeking comfort. Not through trying to think your way into clarity.
The arena gives you clarity. Not your thoughts.
Be playing in the arena. That's not discipline. That's just what you gotta do.