Most people achieve goals and end up in objectively better places. Better role. Better company. More capability. But they don't feel better. "That's it?"
The reason: they did it for the sake of doing it. Because they thought they needed to. Not because it aligned with what they actually want as a person. What they thrive on.
Goalposts should be proxies for deeper desires. The question is: what capability are you actually trying to build?
If you're chasing a marathon just to say you did it, you'll be disappointed. But if you're chasing it because you want a functioning body, agency over your physical capability, then every mile you can check your body. How it's feeling. How you're responding. All the things that were once bugs preventing you from running 26 miles become features showing you how far along you are in building a more functioning body.
A goalpost without an underlying desire makes the work meaningless. You'll suffer through it asking "why am I doing this?" The goalpost alone won't carry you.
But a desire without clear homework makes you paralyzed.
When you can't see the path from here to there, your brain freezes. You hold the whole thing in your head. You default to perfectionism because you don't know what 'good enough' looks like. You feel overwhelmed because you can't break it down into actionable pieces.
Say you want to join the Manhattan Project as a software engineer alongside Einstein and Oppenheimer making $5M a year. You know you need leetcode, portfolio, resume. But what does "good enough" actually mean? You don't know. So your brain defaults to absolutes. "Perfect leetcode. Perfect portfolio. Perfect resume." Because that's the easiest thing to define when you don't actually know what's required.
Same with running. If you've never run before and you want a functioning body, what's the homework? Run every day? Run 10 miles? You don't know. So you might default to "I need to run a full marathon distance in training or I'm not ready." That's the perfectionist trap.
You need clear homework. Without it, your brain wires itself to the highest possible bar because that feels safe.
When you don't know the exact homework, optimize for feedback, not perfection.
Don't fall back to "I need to be perfect." Fall back to "I need to find out where I actually stand."
For running: run 2 miles, see how your body responds. Feel the cramping at mile 1? That's data. Adjust. Run again. Observe. The homework becomes clear through doing.
For the job: solve 5 leetcode problems, see where you struggle. Draft your portfolio, show it to someone who's gotten these jobs. Apply to a few places before you feel "ready." Test where the bar actually is instead of guessing.
You don't need to know the exact path. You need to take the next step, observe what happens, and adjust. The clarity comes from doing, not from planning.
Start with mediocre.
In order to be great, you need to be mediocre first. You need to be average first.
So when you're setting homework, don't ask "what would make me proud?" Ask: "what's mediocre for someone in my position?"
For running: less than 1 mile is below mediocre. 1 mile is mediocre. That's the homework.
For leetcode as an unemployed person: 1-2 problems is below mediocre. 5 problems a day is mediocre. That's the homework.
This isn't about feeling good about yourself. This is about being honest. What's the baseline? What would any average person in this situation do?
That becomes the non-negotiable. The thing you do to not fall behind.
Are you even mediocre? That's the first question. Once you're doing mediocre consistently, then you can think about great.
The formula:
1. Identify your core desire. What do you actually want? Agency? Capability? Competency? Not the trophy. The thing behind it.
2. Pick a forcing function. What external goalpost proves you have it? Marathon. Net worth. Skill rating. Something measurable you can't fake.
3. Ask "what's the homework?" Anytime you demand agency, there comes homework. What does building that capability require today? This shifts you from staring at the gap to taking action. Observing reality as data becomes natural.
Why this works:
When you know "I want a body capable of hard things," the marathon becomes obvious. The homework becomes clear. The discomfort becomes useful.
The goalpost focuses you. It's external. Measurable. But you're building the capability, not chasing the finish line.
When you hit the goalpost, you won't feel empty. And you won't get stuck. Because you already have what you wanted. The goalpost just confirmed it.
Good goals are proxies for deeper desires. If you don't know what yours represent, you're chasing the wrong thing.